A Mosaic In The Making✨

 One of the most frustrating things about growing up is that the older you get, the more you realize you’re turning into your parents. You begin to pick up traits from your parents that you didn’t like growing up. You unconsciously mirror your friends’ behaviors. As we interact with others, we absorb fragments of their personalities, their ways of thinking, or cultural nuances. These fragments become building blocks of our own identity, shaping the mosaic of who we are, a mosaic in the making. Like a mosaic, which is made up of lots of little pieces of colored stone, glass, or paper, we too are made up from others and woven into our being.

There are some traits that you pick up that are life-changing or help you out when you are in a ditch. And some can very much lead to self-destruction so it’s important to be conscious of what traits you pick up. It is crucial to sit with yourself and trace the traits that you portray,  when you do that, you’ll realize that you’re a mosaic of the many people you’ve come in contact with over the course of your life. I like to call myself a mosaic in the making. A mosaic in the making in the sense that I possess traits of all the people I’ve met. The friends, family, strangers, teachers, etc. I’m a work of art and so are you.

. . .

I make my coffee the same way my dad does, scalding hot with two cubes of sugar and lots of milk. I still write poems the same way my English teacher in secondary school taught me to. I love riding bikes because that was my favorite activity with the first boy I really liked. I have mastered the no-makeup makeup look from watching my friend Irene do hers. I toast my bread the same way my friend Emem does with a frying pan and a little oil.

I’ve learned how to be strong and confident in the face of adversity like my friend Diamond. I still stack my books the way my friend Janet taught me to in JS1. I arrange my clothes the same way my sister taught me to when I was 9. I’ve learned how to evade questions I don’t want to answer like my brother. I learned how to time my parents well before asking them for money like my little sister 😂💔.

I’m always ready with mean comebacks for people like my paternal Aunties. I love cooking for my friends and family because that’s how my mum showed people that she loves them and I unconsciously picked it up too. I often make exclamations in ibibio (my native language) just like my grandmother and recently I have formed mine😂.  

The funny thing about picking up traits from people around you is how as you grow up you start exhibiting traits from your parents you don’t like 😭. Like now, I eat stew with almost every food if possible just like my Dad and it’s something that I’ve always disliked growing up. How will someone eat stew with okra and afang?!! Is that not crazy 😭😭💔. Mine has not reached that one sha but it’s there. I must add stew with my spaghetti even if it’s jellof spaghetti or with coconut, jellof and fried rice too. The absolute worst is that I recently ate ekpang nkukwo with stew. This is an abomination in Akwa Ibom cuisine.  It’s honestly so sad and the worst part is that I like it. I really enjoy adding stew to my food so much 😭💔. I hope I don’t start eating stew with soups too😂. Please if I ever do so, I’m giving you guys the permission to call the police on me. 

Then the one I got from my mum is definitely shopping. And this one just appeared out of nowhere oo. Nowhere I tell you! If I’m having a bad day I must buy something. If I’m having a good day, I’ll buy something for that. Then the worst is the “let me just treat myself today” ohhh it’s bad 😭😭💔. Why does this have to be me? If you ask me where my money goes I won’t even be able to give you an accurate answer.

There is a name for this phenomenon and it’s called the “chameleon effect”. This phenomenon describes our innate tendency to unconsciously mimic and adapt to the behavior, emotions, and attitudes of those around us. This is not limited to mere imitation. It goes beyond external appearances and it extends to our perspectives and extends to our internal landscapes as well. It impacts our thoughts, beliefs, values, etc. Like an artist using various shades and textures, we integrate these influences into our own personal masterpiece, adding depth and richness to the mosaic which is us. 

This all came about by me stumbling on an Instagram post a few weeks ago that talked about this.

So what do you think about this phenomenon? I would love to know the traits you’ve picked up from the people around you.

Do you have any unlikely food combinations a friend or family member has taught you that you can’t get enough of?

 Do well to share them in the comment section.